Jar of hearts

I know I can’t take one more step towards you
Cause all that’s waiting is regret
And don’t you know I‘m not your ghost anymore?
You lost the love I loved the most

I learned to live, half-alive
And now you want me one more time

And who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ‘round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?

I hear you’re asking all around
If I am anywhere to be found
I have grown too strong
To ever fall back in your arms

I’ve learned to live, half-alive
Now you want me one more time

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ‘round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Who do you think you are?

Dear, it took so long
Just to feel alright
Remember how to put back
The light in my eyes

I wish I had missed
The first time that we kissed
‘Cause you broke all your promises
And now you’re back you don’t get to get me back

Who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ‘round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
So don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all

And who do you think you are?
Runnin’ ‘round leaving scars
Collecting your jar of hearts
And tearing love apart

You’re gonna catch a cold
From the ice inside your soul
Don’t come back for me
Don’t come back at all

Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?
Who do you think you are?

H - 27

• Berat badan turun 3 kilo, padahal porsi makan seperti biasa
• Tumbuh jerawat (lagi) di muka, padahal sudah lama muka ini mulus bebas dari jerawat -___-
• Tenggorokkan sakit banget !

TETAP SEMANGAT! :|

MAN JADDA WAJADA~

Kenapa Kamu lagi ?

Bep.. Bep.. Bep…

tanda telah ada pesan yang masuk  kedalam ponsel itu berhasil memecah kesunyian malam. Jam di dinding menunjukan tinggal delapan menit lagi menuju pukul dua belas malam.

Siapakah gerangan yang mengirim pesan di tengah malam seperti ini? Padahal hari ini bukan hari ulang tahun gue, dimana kemungkinan orang akan mengirim pesan selamat hari lahir di jam pas pergantian hari.

saat itu gue belum tertidur, langsung bangun dan meraih ponsel yang sedang di-charge di atas meja. gue ambil ponsel dan mulai  gue baca isi pesan masuk yang baru saja diterima, ternyata pengirim pesan itu adalah…….. ‘Dia’

‘Dia’ yang selama tiga tahun terakhir ini membuat gue berada dalam lingkaran ‘bodoh’.. *ah sudahlah, tidak usah di bahas bagaimana kisahnya*

dan pesan yang dikirmnya juga adalah tanda emote ’ :( ‘

saat membaca pesan itu, satu sisi gue mersa khawatir kenapa dia mengirim pesan seperti itu dan jam segini pula. satu sisi gue merasa takut. takut perasaan ini hanyut kembali, ya karena sudah hampir satu tahun ini gue benar-benar tidak komunikasi lagi dengan ‘Dia’ .

jari ini akhirnya luluh juga, seperti biasa Ridwan yang gampang tergoda membalas pesannya..

“ada apa? kenapa sms jam segini???” Dia malah membalas “kok belom tidur?” ergh.. seharusnya gue yang bertanya kenapa dia yang belom tidur dan malah sms di jam orang sedang tidur.

“Aku kangen, Maaf ya.. coba kamu dengerin Lagu Sammy Simorangkir - Kesedihanku. itu yang lagi aku rasain sekarang ke kamu”

belum sempat gue membalas pesan sebelumnya, ‘Dia” sudah mengirim lagi pesan diatas.

Gue cuma bisa terdiam membaca pesan itu.. gue hanya takut kembali mengalami getar-getar di dada. Getaran yg beberapa tahun silam gue merasakannya. Tapi gue mencoba menghiraukan getaran itu, tak ingin usaha move on  satu tahun lalu gagal karena masih tersedot gravitasinya.

Sebenarnya, Saat ini ingin sekali merasakan getaran-getaran seperti itu kembali ketika berkomunikasi dengan seseorang, tapi sayangnya kenapa getaran itu muncul ketika gue berkomunikasi dengan ‘Dia’.

Seharusnya bukan ‘Dia’ orangnya, karena gue sudah terlalu sangat mengenalmu. Mudah-mudahan ini hanya getaran satu malam yang bernama ‘Rindu’ saja, tidak berlanjut berlarut-larut.

Sekarang, saatnya Gue menunggu, akankah ada orang yg bisa memberikan getaran-getaran yang membuat dada kembali sesak seperti itu? Tapi bukan ‘Dia” , Gue ingin sosok baru yang mengisi lembar hidup gue. 

sepinya hari yang ku lewati
tanpa ada dirimu menemani
sunyi ku rasa dalam hidupku
tak mampu ku tuk melangkah

masih ku ingat indah senyummu
yang selalu membuatku mengenangmu
terbawa aku dalam sedihku
tak sadar kini kau tak di sini

engkau masih yang terindah
indah di dalam hatiku
mengapa kisah kita berakhir
yang seperti ini

masih ku ingat indah senyummu
yang selalu membuatku mengenangmu
terbawa aku dalam sedihku
tak sadar kini kau tak di sini

engkau masih yang terindah
indah di dalam hatiku
mengapa kisah kita berakhir
yang seperti ini

yang seperti ini

engkau masih yang terindah
indah di dalam hatiku
mengapa kisah kita berakhir
yang seperti ini

hampa kini yang ku rasa
menangis pun ku tak mampu
hanya sisa kenangan terindah
dan kesedihanku

Sammy Simorangkir - Kesedihanku

Be realistic to be happy!

I learn lots of motivational words. I read lots of inspirational stories. And from what I experience so far, I always hear people say “Never give up!” or “You can do it if you believe.” But I very seldom hear people say “Be realistic. It’s time to give up.”

It’s good when you keep believing and don’t give up for things you want to achieve. But sometimes you also need to look at yourself, open your eyes, and be realistic. After all, this is the way to simplify your life and start enjoying what you have.

Many people are too busy with trying and trying the same thing to get everything right and perfect. I was one of them. For a perfectionist like me, sometimes I feel like everything must be perfect, and I won’t stop trying until I know everything is right. But I don’t realize that what I do just makes my life more complicated. It makes everything more difficult, still I don’t get what I want. It just steals my happiness and makes my burdens heavier. If you’re someone similar to me, change it! Now I’m also learning to change it, and I can feel my life is getting easier.

The truth is, being realistic can move you from your complicated life to a simple life. In simple life, you don’t think too much. Realists still keep believing in their dreams, but they don’t let everything trouble them. You still keep trying, you still keep achieving. When you’re right, you succeed. When you’re wrong, you learn. When it works, you celebrate. When it doesn’t work, look for another way. It helps you to enjoy your life, and that’s the secret of a simple life and happiness!

Now, the difference is just in how you focus your life on. Realists focus to reach their dreams, but unrealists just focus on their own illusions.

However, it’s also important to note that being realistic is totally different from being pessimistic. Don’t be a pessimist as an excuse of being realistic. Pessimists always focus on what they can’t. They’re not willing to take some efforts to achieve something. Realists are different. They’re not a giving-up people. They just don’t waste their times to play their minds with illusion that doesn’t really exist.

Be realistic. Simplify your life. It will be easier.

PS: I’m also still learning this one. Let’s learn together! :)